Dealing with Difficult Behavior in the Elderly

Posted on Wednesday, September 7th, 2011 at 10:11 am and filed under Caregiving, Dementia

 

Family caregivers give the greatest gift of all – their love, energy and time – often at the expense of their own families and in lieu of other things they might like to do.  Unless you have walked in their shoes, you have no idea how rewarding their jobs are.  Caregiving can be difficult, and caregivers can face challenges every hour of every day…especially when dealing with difficult behaviors exhibited by their loved ones

Difficult behavior by a care recipient can be as simple as refusing to take medicine to as frightening as your loved one wandering during the day and night.   Your loved one may become physically or verbally abusive, or both.  They may refuse to eat or drink, and if suffering from dementia, may become paranoid or exercise random periods of yelling.  Those with depression may cry uncontrollably, and refuse to dress themselves or perform other acts of personal hygiene.

Because of the unique emotional ties between a family caregiver and the care recipient, caregivers are at risk of feeling guilty, angry and overwhelmed when dealing with difficult behaviors.  They often feel the situation is their fault, but this is far from the truth.  In fact, the single-most important thing to know when dealing with difficult behaviors is recipients of care do not act out because they do not appreciate or love the caregiver.  They act out as part of their disease process. 

Whether a care recipient is suffering illness, the effects of a stroke, or simply growing old, caregivers have to adapt to broad spectrums of behavior.  Learning what triggers your loved one’s difficult behavior will help.  It is important to note in some cases, medications can cause difficult behavior, and this possibility must be explored and managed by the health care provider in conjunction with determining other triggers.

Many times, the elderly become agitated when over-stimulated by loud noise, crowds, and over-activity.  People experiencing dementia can become angry or upset when they are forgetful, become lost or realize they cannot do things they used to.  Sometimes, the elderly find themselves in a situation that frightens them, and in turn, become overly aggressive and rebellious. Those suffering from a stroke may have damage in the part of the brain that controls behavior…meaning they can no longer control their actions even if they wanted to.

Help your loved one by identifying triggers of their difficult behavior.  If noise or large crowds make your loved one nervous, play calm music set at low volume, and limit visitors to a few at a time.  Keep happy reminders, such as pictures of family, in plain view and label rooms (such as the bathroom) and cabinets (for cups and plates) if memory is an issue.  When anger rises, speak softly but calmly and try to divert your loved one’s attention, but leave the room if you have to.  In the heat of the moment, do what you can to maintain the safety of yourself and your loved one.

Alleviate the situation by:

  • Remaining calm
  • Reminding yourself it’s not your fault
  • Remembering this moment will pass
  • Requesting help from family, friends, and support groups 

 

Above all, give yourself credit by knowing that you are giving the ultimate gift in order to make the life of your loved one easier in times of need.  The reward may be bittersweet in the moment, but with a proper frame of mind and a bit of help, the benefits are worth it in the long run…for you, and your loved one.

References:

Caregiver.org.  Family Caregiver Alliance.  Frequently asked questions.  Retrieved on 4/26/11 from http://www.caregiver.org/caregiver/jsp/fcn_content_node.jsp?nodeid=

2085#quest6.

Buckley, J.B.  Alzheimer’s:  dealing with difficult behavior.  Retrieved on 4/28/11 from http://www.caregiver.com/channels/alz/articles/alzheimers_difficult_behavior.htm                                  

United States Department of Veteran’s Affairs.  Caring for someone with emotional and behavioral needs.  Retrieved on 4/28/11 from http://www.rorc.research.va.gov/rescue/

emotional-needs/difficult-behaviors.cfm.




Music – Brightening the Lives of those with Dementia

Posted on Tuesday, January 11th, 2011 at 1:47 pm and filed under Dementia, Music

 
senior and caregiver

Since the day we were born and possibly even before, our mothers sang to us. Catchy little tunes like Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and You Are My Sunshine followed through our growing years by age-appropriate songs that we clapped, danced and sang along to with family and friends. As we grow older, hearing certain songs sparks nostalgic feelings as we are transported back in time to the exact moments those songs first meant something to us.

Music. A universal language that transcends culture, race and religion, and also, research shows, weaves its way through the seemingly insurmountable barriers of memory loss in those who suffer dementia and Alzheimer’s disease.

Those who have loved ones suffering from dementia know how hard it is to watch the mental deterioration that the disease causes. Your mother may forget not just your name, but who you are. Your father is unable to feed or groom himself because he cannot remember how. Your grandmother may lose years of memories regarding who and where she is. Your grandfather does not speak because he does not remember words he has spoken all his life. Those with severe dementia forget what happened not only in years past, but yesterday, and even five minutes ago. Often, they repeat words and questions, become lost in their own homes and suspicious or scared of loved ones they cannot remember. In turn, they become frustrated, agitated and detached from their surroundings. Some require round-the-clock care because they cannot cook, clean, or remember to take medication or go to the bathroom. People with severe dementia are unable to interact with anyone on the simplest terms, which is not only hard for them, but crushing to their families and friends.

Dementia affects parts of the brain that allow one to perform and remember many basic aspects of life. However, studies show there is one area in the brain, the medial prefrontal cortex, not affected by dementia until perhaps its very late stages. It is this area of the brain that governs our emotions and other sensory abilities. This part of the brain recognizes music, remembers melodies and songs, and recalls feelings those songs caused…even if those feelings were invoked long ago. This finding was helpful in moving the use of music to the forefront of activities of those suffering dementia.

Studies have shown that, during participation in activities involving music, dementia patients remember words to songs of their pasts and sing along, when moments before they could not speak a complete sentence. Some break into broad smiles of remembrance and even move with the beat. Others remember and begin speaking of events that happened within the time period of that song. Caregivers notice that music soothes agitated patients and makes them more receptive to getting dressed, eating or brushing their teeth.