Gathering for the Holidays – Celebrating the Moment & the Memories

Posted on Thursday, December 22nd, 2011 at 11:11 am and filed under Senior Holidays

Observing family holiday traditions—like gathering around the Christmas tree to sing favorite carols or lighting a Menorah—can go a long way to adding joy and comfort to a senior’s family holiday celebration. Holiday gatherings also give adult children an opportunity to talk with their parents to sense and observe whether they are doing well or if they may need help to maintain their independence.

The Mayo Clinic (www.mayoclinic.com), for instance, suggests certain signs and changes to look for. These can include:

• Weight loss, which could indicate serious health problems, assuming that the loss is not part of an intentional health improvement plan. It could indicate conditions such as malnutrition, dementia, depression, heart failure or cancer. Or it could be that the senior is lacking the energy or dexterity to prepare meals.
• Housework and home maintenance, which if it appears to have been neglected, could point to physical impairment or depression. Also look around the house for safety issues such as tripping hazards. Or, is the senior having trouble with stairs?
• Do the seniors appear to maintain good hygiene and dress well? Does it look like they are still taking good care of themselves?
• Mood. Do they seem normal or out of sorts? Are they still involved in their hobbies and interests and getting together with friends? Or do they seem withdrawn or blue?
• Physical abilities. Do they appear to be getting around the house OK? Or are they unsteady on their feet?

 

These kinds of observations open the opportunity to talk with aging parents about their possible need for accommodations or assistance around the home. Emotional partings at the end of holiday reunions could, in fact, have something to do with the seniors feeling less confident than they used to in living independently.

Now is the time to invite them to share their concerns, find out how you can help and discuss with them options, such as in-home caregivers who can assist with the things they are beginning to have difficulty with.

Tips for Having a Not-So-Blue Christmas

Posted on Tuesday, December 13th, 2011 at 10:09 am and filed under Holiday, Senior Holidays

Most people look forward to the holidays with joyful anticipation.  Holidays often represent happy times spent with family and friends, honoring cherished traditions, attending parties and spreading holiday cheer.  Some of the warmest, most favored memories are born during this time of year.

For seniors, however, holidays may elevate feelings of nostalgia and melancholy that can lead to the holiday blues.  The holiday blues mimic signs of depression, but are more prevalent during the months of November, December and January. 

Seniors are especially prone to feeling isolated and depressed during these months for a variety of reasons – from health and money issues to the loss of a spouse or other loved one, or often, just a simple sense of growing old.  Traveling during the holidays may be difficult for seniors and they may be left alone while other family members gather to celebrate the season, increasing the feelings of loneliness and isolation.

The American Geriatrics Society offers a great list of activities to help cope with the holiday blues.  Seniors are encouraged to volunteer at a local charitable organization, attend parties and have family and friends visit throughout the season.  Limiting the use of alcohol is crucial, as alcohol tends to increase feelings of depression.  Talking to family, friends and health care providers about feelings can alleviate sadness and help determine if the symptoms of depression should be treated medically.

Friends and family can help seniors beat the holiday blues by dropping by for a visit over a cup of coffee and inviting seniors to participate in other activities to keep them busy and provide a sense of purpose.  Comfort Keepers®, experts in providing in-home care for seniors, offers suggestions to help families and caregivers make the holidays happy and memorable for the seniors in their lives. 

• Playing a favorite game together or spending time cooking a special meal can chase the blues away. 
• Offering to lend a hand addressing holiday cards to friends and family is a great way to help the senior feel connected to those who live far away. 
• Going caroling, attending a holiday musical, or simply listening to holiday tunes helps to lift spirits. 
• Baking holiday treats together can be as much fun as eating them afterward. 
• Driving through the neighborhood after dark to see the lights is always entertaining and a great way to promote holiday cheer. 
• Sharing past memories helps seniors feel loved, and shows that you have an interest in who they are.
• Strolling around the neighborhood is a good way to keep the blues away if seniors are able and weather permits.

 

It is important to note that the holiday blues usually fade after a short period of time.  Depression, on the other hand, lasts longer and is more serious.  Families and friends who are able to gather with senior loved ones over the holidays should watch closely for behaviors that suggest something more serious may be happening.

Signs of depression include sadness that does not go away, crying often, loss of interest in things that were once pleasurable, restlessness or feeling fatigued, feelings of worthlessness, helplessness or guilt, and thoughts of death or suicide.   If true depression seems to be present, take the time to talk about it honestly with your loved one.  Depression is treatable, but it is important to discuss all options with one’s health care provider.

Although the holiday season can cause the holiday blues, it also provides many opportunities to battle the blues as well.  Try participating in a few of the mentioned holiday activities with your senior loved one in order to keep these feelings at a minimum.   Special time spent together is a gift in itself that will enhance the holiday spirit, and inspire feelings of peace and happiness for all.

To Grandmother’s House We Go

Posted on Thursday, December 8th, 2011 at 4:23 pm and filed under Holiday, Senior Holidays

Many families are traveling over the river and through the woods to reach Grandmother’s (and Grandfather’s) house this holiday season.  It is a tradition held by many families – gathering at an elder’s home to carry on holiday festivities.  While the thought of everyone together under one roof may seem like a joyous time to visit, reminisce, and create new memories, it can often be one of the most stressful times of the year for senior adults.

Jim Booth, CEO of CK Franchising, Inc., the franchisor of the Comfort Keepers® system, notes, “Most seniors become entrenched in their own quiet-but-steady routines as they grow older, and the disruption of an established, daily schedule can cause confusion and anxiety.”  Booth would know, as Comfort Keepers® is one of the nation’s largest in-home care provider networks for seniors and other adults.  A leader in its industry, Comfort Keepers® knows that sometimes even the hustle and bustle of company for a day can be exhausting for seniors.  These times can be equally stressful for caregivers of seniors who are expecting company over the holidays.  However, there are several strategies that, when incorporated within holiday plans, pave the way for a stress-free time for all. 

Plan to share holiday meal preparations.    For grandparents, the feeling of having to prepare an entire meal for many people can be overwhelming.  The thought of cleaning the kitchen afterward may be downright depressing for any caregiver.  A way to alleviate this pressure is to coordinate with other guests by asking them to bring a traditional holiday dish from their pasts for all to enjoy.  Assigning clean-up duty in advance and taking turns with others will allow all to participate equally in work and play. 

Be sure to schedule quiet time for all.  This is especially important if small children are participating in holiday activities.  Many older adults are not used to the otherwise endearing antics of children, and initiating quiet time by taking the kids out of the house or putting them down for a rest provides the senior valuable downtime.  If napping is part of a senior’s daily routine, continuing to do so is important to maintain a happy and healthy body and mind.

Limit gift giving or replace this tradition with sentimental alternatives.  Many seniors living on limited budgets may worry that purchasing presents at Christmas may not fall within their monetary limits.  Instead of purchasing gifts, ask family members to write down a memory from the past to share.  This memory can pertain to family traditions, a specific event, or be a simple reflection of who they are because of growing up within that family.  Large families often draw names instead of purchasing gifts for everyone.  Simple ideas such as these also steer the holiday spirit in the direction of the holiday itself, instead of focusing on gift-giving.

Keep an eye on your loved one.  Sometimes it takes a special eye to notice that a senior is feeling displaced, overly tired, or in need of something special to do.  Assign someone in the family to keep watch over your loved one to be sure their needs are being met. 

Ask for help!  If you are a primary caregiver for the senior in your life, consider hiring a respite care provider such as Comfort Keepers® to allow you to focus on holiday preparations in your own home. Their caregivers are available to help perform light housekeeping duties, grocery shopping and even help address holiday cards and arrange decorations.  Having help with the “small stuff” can be a great relief, allowing seniors and family caregivers to look forward to the holiday festivities instead of feeling overburdened.

When making plans to visit with elderly loved ones over the holidays, consideration of even the smallest detail is essential.  Communicate clearly and honestly with your loved ones and their caregivers about seniors’ needs and limitations.  Keep in mind that many plans can be altered subtly, so seniors do not realize special provisions are being made for them. A bit of thought and careful preparation minimizes stress so that holidays can be fun and enjoyed by all!